Threshold

I wrote this when despair was all that I knew.

In the midst of trying to accomplish things off my to-do-list but I could hold it in no longer, and dropped everything. Threshold- It's becoming so faint I can barely keep myself above this thin line. It's a struggle to battle with yourself telling yourself to just hang in there. "There are some around you who needs you, you have to be strong you cannot collapse"- It breaks my heart to see them broken, these are the people I will stay and be strong for, they are the ones I love, I will never let them down; and at the back of your head you are aware of your being- exhausted and all you need is to run away to your own sanctuary- A break down. But the devil rejoices, life's harsh. 

To be perpetually be strong in this sad state of affairs, is not easy. Every single day for two months- that's a long time. I can be occupied with my friends, school, assignments. I am lying when I say that each time I am away from adversities I do not think about them. It is not easy, when you know for as long as your hill exists, your life will never be back to normal. Every single day's a worry- not knowing when things can change, and when they do they happen in an instant. 

"It's not worth it to live your life according to how people expect you to. At the end of the day, there's only enough space for one body in the coffin. The saddest thing in the world is growing old with regrets. Your life belongs to you alone, go out there and do whatever you want."

The worst part about being strong is that no one ever asks if your okay, and when they ask you burst into tears.